Tommy was referred to Befriend a Child due to social isolation, a need for a positive adult role model, and concerns around his behaviour. At home, Tommy lives with his dad, younger sister and step-mum and spends regular weekends with his mum. As the oldest child navigating separated parents, he often feels different from his peers. Tommy has struggled socially, has been vulnerable to bullying, and is currently undergoing assessments for autism describing that his “brain works differently to everyone else.” His difficulties with peer pressure and desire to fit in have at times led to truancy and poor decision-making.
Tommy began his befriending relationship with David in October 2024 and settled into it quickly. Having consistent 1:1 time with someone who is there solely for him has been hugely beneficial. Early on, the pair realised they shared several interests, including gaming, rock climbing and bouldering. This common ground allowed their relationship to develop naturally, and Tommy was eager to get involved in new activities from the outset.
Rock climbing has become a key part of their time together, and David has seen Tommy’s confidence grow session by session. What started as a shared interest has turned into a powerful tool for building Tommy’s self-esteem. As he has developed new skills on the climbing walls, Tommy has also begun to believe in himself more broadly. His growing confidence has encouraged him to try new things outside of climbing and to approach challenges with a more positive mindset.
The trusting relationship between Tommy and David has also had a significant emotional impact. Knowing that David is there as a consistent, reliable role model and listening ear, Tommy has been able to open up about his struggles, worries, and the things that upset him. Following the recent passing of his grandfather, Tommy felt safe enough to share his feelings and grief with David, and certain things he has said he would not feel able to discuss with his parents. This shows a remarkable level of trust and highlights just how important the befriending relationship has become for him.
David feels strongly that he has already been able to offer Tommy meaningful guidance and support, and their conversations often reach a depth that reflects Tommy’s need for connection and understanding. Their time together gives Tommy a space that is just for him, where he feels heard, valued, and supported without judgement.
A fun twist in their growing friendship was highlighted when Tommy and David discovered they shared the same middle name, something they both feel is a sign that they are the perfect match! Since being matched with David, Tommy has shown increased confidence, improved self-esteem, a greater willingness to try new experiences, and a stronger ability to express his feelings. Their befriending relationship continues to provide Tommy with the positive, steady support he needs to navigate challenges and build on his strengths.
If you have been inspired by Tommy and David’s story and would like to help a local child or young person living in challenging life situations, please reach out to volunteer@befriendachild.org.uk today! Just a few hours of your time each month could support a child like Tommy, giving them the opportunity to thrive.